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Off shoot of Split Enz of course, mostly Neil Finn rather than Tim who concentrated on his solo stuff after the Enz. Crowded House '86 -Something So Strong.

Never saw this Martin Clunes drama until this year, but am enjoying it immensely. Clunes is great as a grumpy doctor come from London trying to settle in with Cornish yokels in a fishing village. Good cast and guest stars, so far, John Alderton and Ben Miller. Stephanie Cole is a regular...

Back at his agent Jane Plough's office. J " you bloody snake Toast, f*** ing weasel. Going behind my back" T " oh, I asked her not to tell you" J " Brooke and I are very close, of course she'd tell me if a client of mine is deserting like a rat, and f***ing sit up straight when I'm talking to...

Toast enters the Dorchester hotel, not THE Dorchester, but A Dorchester hotel, a fleapit. In an upstairs room Toast enters. Frinkbuster is sitting on the bed. Fb " Steven, glad to meet you" T " so what's this film you're doing?" Fb " it's about two lesbians, they want to try something else, so...

Back home; T " there she was banging on about how impossible it was to spontaneously combust, when she spontaneously combusted. The very definition of irony writ large." Toast's phone rings, T " hello, yes... great, I'll be over there right away" Ed " who was that Toast?" T " Brooke Hooberman...

Back home Toast excitedly runs into the kitchen , T " Ed , I've found an ending to my novel, it's great, I'm very happy with it" Ed " what happens to the delightful Stephanie?" T " spontaneous combustion!" In the publishers office Yvonne is not happy, reaching for pills and swigging alcohol...

Toast is in the Colonial club boozing, people are at a darts board playing when a man says, Man " good shot Deepa" Toast hears, T "Deepa!!?" He gets up, sure enough Deepa minus sunglasses is playing darts. T " I knew it, all that deaf and blind stuff, was total bullshit" D " I was deaf and...

Next morning Toast is at his laptop working when Ed comes in. Ed " still working on the novel Toast, must be nearly ready if you don't need an end" T " looks like I'll need an end after all, publisher lady thinks it's crucial. What happens to Stephanie de Swasson is proving a tough nut to...

Back home Toast is reading a clip from his novel to Kate, Deepa is also there in the kitchen staring blankly . T " Henry the eighth felt hot that day and not just because the sun was beating down on the ramparts of Hampton court Palace. Stephanie began to undress for her monarch, Henry responded...

Publisher Yvonne Riley is in her office swigging down about a dozen pills, a recovering alcoholic and nervous breakdown patient, Toast enters, after introductions they chat. Yv " wow, what a book Steven. It's one of the best books I've ever read. Sexier than 50 shades and just better than any of...

Back at Kate's place, she and Toast are in bed, having full sex. K " aarrgh, yes, yes oohh," T " oh wow, yes, arrgh,, you don't mind I'm wearing my sports vest?" K " no, aarrhh, give it to me, oh yes" Suddenly Toast stops, looks over at Deepa sitting staring at them. K " what's the matter...

In " The Colonial" drinking club Toast is chatting to a young Indian lady. T " it was embarrassing really, but Hooberman promised not to tell Jane" Girl " who is Jane exactly?" T " she's my agent" Girl " so you're some sort of actor" T " not some sort of actor, I am an actor ,Steven Toast" K "...

Toast is in the back of a parked car with Brooke Hooberman, a theatrical agent, hard faced indeed, she has over botoxed her face, and she has no facial muscle movement at all, and speaks without moving her lips. BH " there's always openings in Hollywood for British actors, chauffeurs, butlers...

At his home he shares with Ed Howser-Black, Toast is in the kitchen busy at his laptop as Ed in dressing gown comes in. Ed notices on the laptop screen - Another Wife For Henry by Paloma Toast. Ed " what's this file Toast?" T " my new novel Ed" Ed " using a nom de plume?" T " yes, I've been...

In Wardour Street, central London , Toast is in the office of his agent, Jane Plough. On the wall she has a framed photo of all her clients including Toast. She has a new photo to hang up, actress Sookie Houseboat, a brunette thirty something. T " Sookie Houseboat?" J " yes, just come on board...

Toast is in Scramble Studios doing a voice over, his voice often used in radio ads or as a Sat Nav guide voice. He sits in a soundproof studio, headphones on, the staff look on from behind glass. Toast ( into mic) " the new TS4, it's the car that literally goes verooooom" The studio head honcho...

Background: Steven Toast , an actor, and not a very good one desperately continues to look for work. His agent is the neurotic Jane Plough, he resides as a lodger with fellow actor Ed Howser- Black and often has to do voice over work in the nearby Scramble Studios, close to his home in central...