The title would be the same as what the girl at the paper shop tells me each week when I get my X-Lotto ticket checked: NO WINS YET. The follow up will be called: THERE'S ALWAYS NEXT WEEK. Alternatively, I could also call it what my pretty young neighbour said to me last week: GET OUT! YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE IN HERE! AND STOP PHOTOGRAPHING ME WHILE I'M NAKED!
A few that I can think of: HOW TO FAIL IN LIFE WITHOUT REALLY TRYING MEMOIRS OF A COMPLETE NOBODY THE SECRETS TO THE MYSTERY OF LIFE (or Pay $24.99 and Read 247 Pages of Bullshit) THINGS I'VE EATEN FROM THE BACK OF THE FRIDGE THAT SMELLED BAD BUT DIDN'T KILL ME IS THAT ANT-MAC SITTING IN THE MAPLE TREE OUTSIDE MY BEDROOM WINDOW AND OTHER POEMS THAT DON'T RHYME
I thought about writing a semi-fictionalized story where my proxy would be named Norman, family name Lindt having been simplified to Lint at Ellis Island. Title of the book, 'The Exciting World of Lint'. edit - and my epitaph will read "Wait, I think I get it now-"
