Fun The Joke Thread

Discussion in 'Amusement: General' started by ant-mac, Feb 21, 2017.

  1. ant-mac

    ant-mac Administrator
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    And as I climaxed inside of her, I knew I'd never be allowed to visit the Statue of Liberty again...
     
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  2. ant-mac

    ant-mac Administrator
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    In reality, I'm a man trapped inside the body of a woman...

    It happened last night while we were trying a new position and we're both too embarrassed to phone for help.
     
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  3. ant-mac

    ant-mac Administrator
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    One night a Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, “It’s going to rain.”

    His wife asked, “How do you know?”

    “Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”
     
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  4. ant-mac

    ant-mac Administrator
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    My mate told me he's going out with twins.

    I said to him, "That's great, but how do you tell them apart?"

    He said, "The brother has a moustache."
     
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  5. ant-mac

    ant-mac Administrator
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    I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she said I had the biggest penis she'd ever laid her hands on. I said, "You're pulling my leg."
     
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  6. ant-mac

    ant-mac Administrator
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    I went for my routine check up today and everything seemed to be going fine until he stuck his index finger up my arse!

    Do you think I should change dentists?
     
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  7. ant-mac

    ant-mac Administrator
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    Three cowboys sat around a campfire, bragging about how tough they were.

    The first cowboy said, "I was attacked by six rustlers, but I was able to fight them all off single-handed."

    The second cowboy said, "That's nothing! I killed a whole war party of Apaches single-handed with my Winchester."

    The third cowboy said nothing. He just sat there quietly stoking the fire with his dick.
     
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  8. chainsaw_metal1

    chainsaw_metal1 Member: Rank 8

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    I once dated a girl with a wooden leg. But I broke it off.
     
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  9. ant-mac

    ant-mac Administrator
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    I used to date a girl with a wandering eye, but I let her go when I found that she was seeing someone on the side.
     
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  10. ant-mac

    ant-mac Administrator
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    I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get reincarnated, but must come back as a different creature. She said she'd like to come back as a cow. I said, "You're obviously not listening."
     
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  11. ant-mac

    ant-mac Administrator
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    The wife has been missing a week now. Police said I should prepare for the worst. So I have to go to the thrift shop to get all of her clothes back.
     
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  12. ant-mac

    ant-mac Administrator
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    My girlfriend thinks that I'm a stalker. Well, she's not exactly my girlfriend... yet.
     
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  13. ant-mac

    ant-mac Administrator
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    I used to date a girl who had had a colostomy, but we broke up because she always left me holding the bag.
     
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